Hi Kids, Dad has cancer...

This week, I found out my Dad has cancer. Not the bad might kill you tomorrow kind, the kind you can cut out and then forget about forever once the stitches heal. That doesn’t stop me from worrying about it though. My grandfather had three aggressive brain tumours caused by melanoma, each time he was given six months to live. Although being a tough-nut McMaster, he survived all three against the odds and then years later went to on to simultaneously break his hip and get pneumonia to finish himself off in style.

The issue isn’t that Dad has skin cancer, it’s par for the course for someone who worked in the sun for years with pale, freckled skin. My issue is, Mum texted us to let us know... ‘Hey kids, Dad has cancer, nothing to worry about though! x’.

Has technology made us lose sight of the importance of some news? Doesn’t a significant illness warrant a phone call, at least? Perhaps it seems more significant to me than them. As their child I’m cognisant that the day will come when it’s them I’m sitting awkwardly beside in a hospital bed after they trip over the caravan draw bar. Still, when did an emoji laden text message become the preferred method of delivery for important news?

The majority of important news about family and friends I have heard about via my Facebook newsfeed. If it wasn’t for that, I wouldn’t know about it, In demonstration of that point, my sister who is currently sans-Facey is consistently in the dark about the events of our extended family. In her words, ‘if it was important to them that I know, they would tell me themselves’. She’s on the money there, but also feeling pretty shit because it seems like no one cares enough anymore to tell her direct. So I now get to spend a lot of time taking screen shots of Facebook to send to her, because otherwise she won’t know who I’m complaining about when I ring. I know Zuckerberg probably intended to bring us closer together, but I feel as though I’m strangely disconnected from everything that happens. You see someone since their post and say ‘oh hey, I saw your thing on Facebook’, and they don’t even get the chance to tell you because it’s already been told.

Thankfully, Mum isn’t just posting about Dad’s cancer online, but is a text message really even above a Facebook status on the communication chain? It turns out, yes. I am currently studying as part of an endeavour to stop my brain cells from dying of boredom and this unit I chose to study Business Communications, mostly because I feel like it’s fancy to have a minor in Public Relations, and it’s interesting as fuck to understand how people communicate.

As part of my research for an assignment I have discovered that there is literally an academically accepted ranking of the best way to communicate effectively. Surprising absolutely no one at all, it goes something like this, Face-to-face > Video Call > Phone Call > E-mail & Letter > Chat & Text Service > Social media. By that extension I would assume that the more important the message, the further up the chain the medium you would choose to communicate it.

Therefore, I can only conclude that when Dad has serious cancer I might get an email, and if he dies, perhaps a phone call. Video calls and face-to-face communication will be saved for the truly important things Mum & Dad want me to know about, such as the new concrete slab in their backyard and that they went to the tip on Sunday.